The Glamorous (Double) Life of Isabel Bookbinder, by Holly McQueen

I read this book for a few reasons: 1. it has a pretty cover 2. it has a cool title 3. it sounded like a good chic lit read. What I did not realize about this book was that the main character would drive me up the wall, across the ceiling, and back. I cannot stand naive optimists who lie and get themselves into sticky situations (ahem, Confessions of a Shopaholic). Well, Isabel Bookbinder is exactly like Becky Bloomwood. They both make up the weirdest things and just assume that everything is going to happen. Isabel assumes she is going to be a bestselling Novelist (with a capital N), and plans just about everything to perfect her Novelist image which includes just about everything (as I said before) except for actually writing the book. That would help, don't you think? In case you haven't noticed from reading my other posts, I am a cynical optimist, one who hopes for the best while knowing it probably won't happen. (which is a really good outlook on life because it keeps you upbeat and doesn't disappoint.) Isabel scratched at every cynical bone in my body as I wanted to scream at her to shut up and start scribbling already.

Isabel wants to be a writer, and has a lousy job at a newspaper where she is underappreciated (of course). Then she accidentally exposes a political scandal which has nothing to do with the rest of the story and goes off to a glamorous new job as an assistant to a bestselling author. The actual book is way better than I made it sound but you get that.

Lovely. Absolutely Lovely. Now will someone please give a literary hammer so I can bang Isabel on the head a few times?

4.6 stars. I'm telling you, it's way better than my review makes it seem.

The stars are sparkly on my version.

The Eternal Kiss, 13 Vampire Tales of Blood and Desire, edited by Trisha Telep

I am not a fan of short stories. In fact, I cannnot stand them for the sole reason that there is too much information and too little information. (Most of the time that is. Zombies vs. Unicorns was perfect.) At the same time that the individual authors are trying to complete a short story, you can practically see more ideas coming to thier heads so the story ends up with way too many details. Of all the stories in this book I can only think of 3 that I thought were really good and only one which I actually enjoyed. But since all the vampire stuff is mushing together in my head and I will go through each story individually and try to summarize them in as few words as possible. And I'll rate them because that is always fun. (Yes. I like rating things. It sorts everything out into columns which is a good organizational method for my head which is weirder than any other head you've ever been in. I can guaruntee that.)

Falling to Ash, by Karen Mahoney: Cool concept, but no real end to the story. Vampire chick is on a mission to kill a vampire hunter and gets sidetracked by a hot guy. 4 stars.

Shelter Island, by Melissa de la Cruz: Am a big fan of the author but read this story in a Blue Bloods book so I skipped it here. 4.5 stars.

Sword Point, by Maria V. Snyder: The best story in the book. Girl is fencer and goes to special training school where meets hot guy+evil vampires (vampires=evil in this story) 5 stars

The Coldest Girl in Coldtown, by Holly Black: Freaky. Really freaky but genious. Too much to explain but not too much for a short story. Perfect vampire story, just too gloomy for me. I like happy endings. No happy endings here. Or beginnings. Or middle. 4.3 stars

Undead is Very Hot Right Now, by Sarah Rees Brennan: I forgot about this one but it was good. Not depressing, kinda funny. Guy is vampire and rock star. Learns a lesson from a fan girl. 4 stars.

It has come to my attention that I have been rating these stories higher than I meant to. I am very sorry. My happy side is defeating my sarcastic side repeatedly. My sarcastic side is going to cry now.

Kat, by Kelley Armstrong: I've read other books by Armstrong that take place in this world so I got was going on and am unfit to judge. 4.2 stars.

The Thirteenth Step, by Libba Bray: From what I've read of Libba Bray, that woman's brain must be a dark place. But this story was just what a vampire story should be. Too shivery to divulge any details. 3.8 stars. (I know it is less stars but sarcasm is starting to win and the story did almost give me nightmares.)

All Hallows, by Rachel Caine: Hated it. One of the worst if not the worst story in the book. Too bad to even tell you about. But if you read even one of her Morganville vampires books you know how bad an author she is. 1.9 stars.

Wet Teeth, by Cecil Castellucci: Another proper vampire story. For all of you who don't know, vampires are BAD. They are not misunderstood lovers who try their hardest not to bite you. Miles was bad but he had some emotions but was still bad. 3.7 stars.

Other Boys, by Cassandra Clare: Starts off innocent and slowly gets creepy until you want to chuck the book across the room. Clare tends to put book-chucking qualities in her stories. (Read: supposed incest). No incest here but the last paragraph made my gag reflex act up. Girl likes boy who pretends he is vampire. Then crazy stuff happens. 3.7 stars.

Passing, by Nancy Holder and Debbie Viguie: Amazing story, but would be better as a full legnth novel. Too much had to be explained. But still amazing. 3.5 stars.

Ambition, by Lili St. Crow: Revenge of the outcasts. 4.7 stars.

All Wounds, by Dina James: I would say that would be better as a full legnth book but it probably wouldn't be. Entire intro is unnecessary. 3.4 stars.

What I have learned from this book is that the best vampires are evil ones; nice ones don't make sense. I also learned that vampires should be avoided at all costs if possible. Because if they don't bite you and they're good, you'll just end up in love with them. And you wouldn't believe the moral anguish they go through over that.

In total: 4 stars.



Yes, I know it looks trashy.

Heart of the Matter, by Emily Giffin

Let me tell you-the inside cover told me almost nothing about the book so before you read it I will provide you with a little more information. All it says is that there is this woman Tessa who is married to some fancy doctor guy and has the perfect life with two adorable children. Valerie is a single mom with a kid who is also adorable. BAM-there is an accident and their lives collide in a way they never would have imagined. To tell you the truth, I was convinced that Tessa's Dr. Right would be Valerie's baby daddy and I thought that would make for a pretty cool story but alas, I was wrong. If you don't want to find out anymore stop here; if you were in the same room as me while I read the book and screamed about it (you know who you are), you already know the plot because I screamed and yelped and hollered about it.

Here it goes (and it's a lot simpler than I thought): Tessa's Dr. Perfect isn't so Perfect and is more of a Dr. Seems Like He's Perfect but is NOT!!!!! Yup, you guessed it--he has a slight thing with Valerie that turns into something not so slight but extremely emotional and somewhat physical. And Tessa is sitting at home knitting and being a good mom this whole time. Let me tell you, this guy has nerve, because when she confronts him about their marriage heading down an alleyway that slightly resembles a latrine and asks why he's been distant he FREAKIN' BLAMES HER!!!!! This book made me mildly upset if you couldn't tell. And I just skipped the whole story. How did the lovelorn lovers meet? Well, Dr. I'm So Handsome And Everyone Loves Me happens to be a pediatric plastic surgeon which means instead of making millions off insecure women who want everything enlarged or shrunk he saves kids' lives. So it's kind of hard to hate him. But after leaving his anniversary dinner (yes, his anniversary dinner) he goes to the hospital to save Valerie's son Charlie's life. Which he does. And then he fools poor Charlie into thinking that he is a father figure. (EVILNESS). But the point of the book is Tessa and Valerie. And I cheered for Tessa. She's the one married to him with kids you know. He is hers and hers alone; don't let that pretty face fool you.

Emotions were off the wall--I literally (and literaturely, pun totally intended) felt what Valerie and Tessa were feeling. But Nick, spawn of Voldemort, you don't have feelings. All you can do is fix kids and make cute babies and break hearts.

On a side note, Tessa is Dex from Something Borrowed's brother. (That's another great book by Emily Giffin.) And you find out what happened to him after the end of Something Blue here so that was cool. But that guy gave his sister some serious karma, let me tell you.

I am at a loss here. 4 stars, I guess. Points off for not being what I thought it would be. The cover was too happy looking. Sad things should not be happy looking. Doesn't everyone know that?



The Book of Tomorrow, by Cecelia Ahern

I don't know if I commented on any Cecelia Ahern books yet but let me tell you: you will never read anything like them. I don't love all the ones I've read but I've never read any other books that can compare. On that note, I will say that The Book of Tomorrow was the slowest of the ones I've read. Not my least favorite, it just took way too long to get interesting.

Tamara Goodwin's father commits suicide right when his fortune is totally depleted (no thanks to the family's lavish lifestyle) and so Tamara and her mother go to live in the middle of nowhere with her aunt and uncle. There happens to be a castle in the middle of nowhere, by the way. It is very boring there. Interesting things happened very slowly, so slowly that I didn't even find them interesting by the time they happened. Then Tamara finds a book that is, well, the book of tomorrow. Every day that she opens it up she finds her own diary entry from the next day. She can choose to follow what it says or deny the things that she doesn't want to happen. Freaky, right? Tamara is curious, and has many questions that build up until they are all answered in the last few chapters. So you are sitting there semi bored and semi curious until the end.

The setting was a little bit bothersome, but the characters were funny. The villain is so psychotically evil that the book is fun. And don't underestimate the mom. Or Uncle Arthur. There is more to them than you think. (Now I'm leaving you in suspense. Can you tell?)

3.9 stars. I wanted to go into the 4's but I couldn't.

Get Lucky, by Katharine Center

I must say, this book pleasantly surprised me. It was small and the summary in the back didn't say much about it so I was going into it unprepared. But, as I said before, it was better than I thought it would be. Even if the title has almost nothing to do with the actual story. But, what is the story, you are asking. And I am about to answer your question.

Sarah is this successful ad agency person who after finishing up with a job that should have gotten her a promotion sent a dirty email to everyone at her company and got fired. Boo hoo. Now she is going to her sister for Thanksgiving. Yay! Her sister, Mackie (love that name) is all depressed because she can't have kids and has finally given up on it ever happening. Sarah can't bear to see her sister like this and comes up with a brilliant idea. Her own sister's uterus is no good as a baby oven, but Sarah's is!! So Sarah decides to gestate her neice/nephew for 9 months (which is even more selfless than it sounds) and everyone is excited. The author also doesn't skim over the ugly parts of pregnancy. In some books the only proof that someone is pregnant is that she vomits twice and has a big belly but not Get Lucky. Oh, and Sarah's love interest is this guy who she dated in high school and whose heart she crushed with a sledgehammer. What is a sledgehammer, by the way? I've always wondered. Anyway, she and the once nerd share all these I hate you-I love you-I hate you moments until the end which is somewhat predictable. That was a run on sentence. I think.

The people in this book are awesome. I shouldn't use that word, it sounds too teenager-ish. The people in this book are _______(any word meaning awesome). No one is perfect; every relationship has a flaw. For instance, Sarah who seems so selfless, clawed out her ex's heart in high school. And Mackie who seems like the sweetest and perfect-est older sister ever is really annoying. Like, really annoying. The whole sister relationship was also entirely possible. As a sister with many sisters, I can vouch for the book in that this is what a real sisterly relationship looks like. Not only the mushy stuff or the rivalry stuff, but a perfect combination of both. I also felt Sarah's emotions as I read. It was a tad creepy. My favorite character is Howard. But you'll have to read the book to find out who he is. Ha ha.

5 stars. I majorly underestimated this book by its cover. If that sentence doesn't make sense, you get what I'm saying.