Sunday, August 21, 2011

Beauty Queens, by libba Bray

Before i start i am going to apologize for the letters i cannot capitolize-including i if you couldn't tell. The left shift key is broken on the laptop i'm using so to any grammar freaks reading this, find something else to read or get over yourself. i'll also be using a lot of dashes instead of parenthases but i don't think anyone will complain about that.

Beauty Queens is one of the best and smartest and funniest and awesomest and best books i have ever read. The sarcasm and wit alone kept me laughing the entire time. The story was unique and brilliant. Come on, would you think to write a book about some teenage beauty queens stranded on an island/-that's a question mark by the way. no, you wouldn't.

After their plane crashes, the miss Teen Dream contestants must learn to live on a deserted island while waiting for rescue. This book is kind of like lost just with a bunch of teenage girls more concerned about evening gowns than actual food and shelter and staying alive. Their adventures are joined by a group of reality TV pirates who are less ready for life on the island than the girls were, if possible. There is also something fishy going on on the island and it may not be as deserted as the girls thought.

The characters were one of the best parts of the book. Each one was so different from the others and the fact that they called each other by their states half the time made it even funnier. in fact, some of their names are only mentioned for the first time at the end of the whole book! The rest of the time they were just called ohio and new mexico. The main characters are Adina, from new hampshire, a journalist who wants to expose the superficiality and sexism of pageants. There's Taylor from Texas who is the leader and more interested in practicing for the pageant than trying to get rescued. Tiara from mississippi, nicole from Colorado, Shanti from California, Sosie from illinois, jennifer from michigan, petra from Rhode island, mary lou from nebraska are all their own characters as well, establishing themselves as their own personalities and not just pageant princesses right from the start. it was interesting to watch which paired up to become friends after they stopped seeing each other purely as competition.

A big part of the story is the Corporation, the corporation that sponsors the pageant. The Corporation practically controls everything, drawing in consumers with things they didn't know they needed-my favorite; maxi pad pets!!-, stupid TV shows such as Captians Bodacious iV; Badder and more Bodaciouser-the pirates' show- and basically representing and making fun of consumer America. The girls are the epitome of what the Corporation wants them to be until they have to settle on the island and discover that their brains are meant to be used and that their looks don't define them. Well, some of them learn that. others know that already.

pageants confuse me. They try to act like they're pro-feminism while promoting judging girls on their bodies and looks. They promote philanthropy and the girls have to be well-rounded in all sorts of things with more extra-curriculars than a collage application but to the girls all that matters is the crown. And in the end, the ugly one isn't going to win even if she is 10 times more impressive than everyone else. So all that they do is teach girls that the only way to get anywhere in life is to be gorgeous.

5 stars. If only i could give more.

At first i wasn't impressed by the cover. Then i realized that it was lipstick.

No comments: